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This weekend I've been lucky enough to escape on a Retreat with 27 other beautiful women in business. To learn how to better serve our customers as we grow and many more things. I was expecting lots of tips and tricks and strategies to streamline and better manage my time and ensuring you all get exactly what you deserve. Fabulous service, fabulous curls. Curl Confidence.
What I wasn't expecting, was that it would take me so much deeper than just Business.
Somewhere so personal. So deep inside my brain, my heart and myself.
I knew it was there, I had thought it often - but I had never really felt it.
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It's funny how life changes... How we change.
As a child I very quickly learnt that my curls were 'different'. I learnt that they were unmanageable, messy, needed to be tamed .
As a teen I learnt it was unattractive, not 'hot', something to be made fun of and something to be ashamed of.
As a young adult I learnt it was unprofessional, undesirable, unkempt. Something that I needed to fix if I ever wanted a good job, a good husband or to simply be good.
I took all these 'learnings', all the comments, all the insults and I became them.
The crazy girl, with the crazy hair.
Insults seem to hurt a little less when you've already heard them from yourself.
Jokes seem funnier when you're making them yourself.
Right?? What I didn't know, could never know, was that soon, I would start to truly believe these things. I was untidy, unloveable, and would never be taken seriosuly. Not just my hair - ME.
I wholeheartedly believed that.
Never in my wildest imaginings did I think that, as a 31 year old women, I would FINALLY be able to say SCREW YOU to all those things I learnt.
It didn't happen over night, it didn't happen the first time I had an awesome curl day and it certainly didn't happen the 1000th time I had an awesome curl day.
But it happened.
Slowly but surely those layers peeled away.
With every Curly who cried happy tears seeing themselves after our session.
Every teen who now went to school with confidence
Every Mum who no longer felt they were torturing their curly kid with a brush
Every Corporate Curly that wore their curls and felt POWERFUL instead of ashamed.
Every compliment, every comment, every heartfelt thank you.
It happened.
Slowly but surely.
On the first day of this retreat we took turns to introduce ourselves, our business, what we loved about it and why we were here.
Listening to everyone else's stories I could feel those old learnings coming back, the self consciousness, the never being taken seriously, the feeling of not belonging in the corporate world.
Along with some newer ones.
The laughs that folk let slip when I told them I have a Curly Hair Business. The comments that all I do is put products in a box. The inverted comma fingers when someone asked how my "business" was going. I felt sick. Who was I to think I belonged in this room, with these amazing ladies. I stood up. I had no plan of what to say. Then I didn't say anything.
Instead I Cried I cried for 5yo me getting teased. I cried for the teenage me being told I would be pretty IF I had straight hair. I cried for the 17yo me who had water sprayed on her freshly straightened hair (that took 2 hours!!) because "It looks funny when it puffs out".
and I cried for every Curly who had experienced similar.
It was in that moment I truly realised what I do and why. Then I spoke.
It's not only about the business, the products, the being pretty or the perfect curls.
It's about the Curlies. It's about US.
Every . Single . One of our customers, our Social Media friends. Every curly, of every age.
Our confidence and our rights to be our natural selves.
This Little Curl, to me, is somewhere Curlies can come to feel safe, to feel welcomed, TO FEEL CELEBRATED. Whether you're new to the Curly game or you've been around a while. I want to (and I will) make as many people as I can, aware of how much more our Curls are to us. How much those comments, jokes and jibes affect us long after the fact. I NEVER want another person to feel less-than, just because of the hair on her head. And I know I'm not alone.
So here I am. Perfectly imperfect curls on my head, PROUD to be a Curly Girl.
Even more proud to be 'sticking it to the man'.
If you're ready to start your Curly Journey, check out our Basic Beginners Guide.
A step by step guide on how to start getting the best from your curls.
I would love to hear what embracing your curls means to you. Please feel free to share in the comments ❤️
